KENYA SUMAKU

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The Week at a glance: Sovereignty and a cat’s nine skins

Posted by Popular Ombudsman on October 3, 2009

by Tony Mongare
The week was eventful, as it saw the Ringera Debacle dragging on to mid-week when the former KACC boss and his deputy bowed out on Wednesday. The former director was as contrite as a literal cat; in stark contrast to the elephant that he appeared to be last week as he read the riot act to the Advisory Board which ordinarily supervises him. He had advised them to call for a fundraising to put up the advertisements for his job because he was not about to waste any commission money on a useless exercise when he was already excited to be in office. Perhaps the saying that ‘pride goes before a fall is true after all’.

A CID officer and his wife were shot at close range in Githiga, Kiambu. Although he was armed, this did not help. He was said to own matatus on Wangige and Westlands routes. This set my memory in fast rewind to a day when, having taken a matatu to Westlands, a traffic cop stopped it outside Old Nation House. The conductor requested the driver to stop, waited patiently for the cop to come level with the matatu door and delivered a mouthful of phlegm which he had collected from cavities leading to his mouth bang on the face of the cop. He merrily banged the matatu and told the driver, tutii! So as we joined the rest of Kenyans to mourn this needless loss of lives, I remembered that there are untouchable matatus which belong to senior policemen, which are responsible for a lot of the madness observed on our roads. Who will stop policemen from owning matatus due to obvious conflict of interest??

Wetangula had not finished saying ‘protocol’ before another thunderbolt was delivered, this time from the UK and the European Union. Since we already have a precedent, the President should write to the Queen of England, and the heads of state of the European Union to warn each of them to desist from flouting protocols and prejudicing our sovereignty as he did with the USA. The USA meanwhile softly replied that no protocol had been flouted thus far. It appears that smart sanctions properly targeted (Australia which hosts many of the children of these mawaziri, China and India should follow suit) can bear much fruit; we can even have a new constitution in two months flat. No kidding!

A certain man called Moreno Ocampo will be in town together with another one called Kofi Annan both of whom have become veritable gadflies. The pair thinks that they love the Kenyan steak more than the ‘kiama’. Instead of talking to stakeholders, they have developed this bad habit of haranguing the steakholders. As for the steakholders, once the first suspect goes to the ICC, the threats and dismissive weekend ‘barazas’ may be toned down and wheeler dealing between steakholders cease. It is only a question of time.

Kiraitu Murungi and Daniel arap Moi patched up last week-end. They have both seen the same light. It may be recalled that Kiraitu advised the former president who did not retire, to go herd his goats and watch and see how good governance works. For a time, Mr. Moi seems to have taken the advise seriously because he kept to himself and minded his private business. It was soon after, that certain whispers started being heard about an Anglo-leasing and a Triton. These are the dangers of trusting any politician. The most hazardous item near a politician is a small device called a microphone. If you are in doubt, ask Mwiraria, Ringera or Kimunya. Or better still, have a chat with John Githongo.

Going to parliament nowadays is risky business. There are men (yes, only men no women) who once they become MP’s seem to feed too much on steak and forget to zip-up. The list is expanding now to include Soita Shitanda, Sospeter Ojaamong, Lucas Maitha, Oloo Aringo and a certain former preacher and MP from coast. What is it with being a parliamentarian? Is it the payslip or too much free time?

Finally, Dunson Mungatana, the man from Tana River wants to disband KACC. He is serious and has accordingly published a Bill to that effect. Methinks somebody is worried they may not influence who goes into KACC during the coming recruitment and as such, KACC must die if Ringera is not there. To all of you out there, there is need to start another storm to preserve KACC and enhance its powers.

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